Self Evaluation

Me and my big girl, Maggie.

Inspired by my friend Zee at A Nugget of Joy, I have done a ten year evaluation of myself. She set the challenge of observing changes in herself, and asked others to do the same. I must say I am pleasantly surprised to see so many positive changes! 

Ten years ago I was 22 years old. At that time, Maggie was 2 years old and we lived in a tiny 2 bedroom duplex. We were financially struggling (more than now, that is!) and I was pretty focused on me and my wants, as well as how I measured up with others. I had plenty of maturing to do and much to learn about life (not that I’m done, but I’ve learned a lot!)

So, here are some of the ways I’ve changed in the last ten years:

• I am more patient. This applies to many things: the kids’ behavior, waiting in lines, driving, etc.
• I am less defensive. I used to respond swiftly with negativity if my husband pointed out anything unflattering about me (how I sounded with Maggie, etc).
• I am less controlling. I don’t expect for the children or my husband to do things “my way” anymore. I allow them to be THEM.
• I am more frugal. I really think about saving money and find ways to do so.
• I am less concerned about homeschooling. After many years of teaching the children at home, I have relaxed about how and what they learn. 
• I am less hurried with time. I have realized how fast the years really do go and have changed how I feel about things happening NOW. I desire to enjoy each stage of life and not hurry through them to get to the next one.
• I am more hurried in the home. Unfortunately, I have so many things going on in the home and teaching, that I feel I don’t have time to relax and just chill and enjoy the kids the way I should. Of course, this is just a matter of me prioritizing my time. Which I need to do.
• I am more focused on health. I have learned a great deal about fitness and what makes a healthy diet in the last 10 years, and am much healthier because of it.
• I am more trusting of natural living. Medications and interventions are not needed as often as I  used to think.
• I am more relaxed as a parent. I don’t stress about the kids the way I used to. I would easily get worked up and analyze every little parenting choice to death. Now I really focus on those things that actually need my thoughts, as opposed to giving all things equal brain power.
• I am less comparative. I’m not entirely sure if that it’s even a word (ha), but I’m talking about comparing myself, as a mom, with other women. I was bad about comparing and feeling like I was doing things wrong. Found out, though, that there are many, MANY ways to parent and still get it right.
• I am less worried about what others think. This is especially true about extended family. I cared so much about what they thought that it interfered with my joy on holidays! 
• I am more supportive as a wife. I have changed as a wife in a multitude of ways, only one of which is being more supportive of him.
• I am more forgiving. I still have a long way to go, but I don’t hold a grudge the way that I did ten years ago.
• I am more focused on pleasing the Lord than others. This goes along with not worrying about what others think, but it’s more than that, even. In everything I do, I want to be pleasing to Him.
• I am more comfortable meeting new people. I am not nearly as introverted as I used to be, or as shy. There’s nothing wrong with either quality, but I have enjoyed becoming more relaxed around people.
• I am less judgemental. Over the years I have met so many people, and they all do things differently; this has caused me to be more open to accepting differences.
• I listen more and talk less. I still talk a lot , but I am a much better listener than I used to be and I enjoy hearing what others have to say.
• I am more content. I don’t want, want, want the way that I did ten years ago…or even five years ago. I am happy with what we have. 

I challenge you to take a little time and compare the you from ten years ago with the you now. It has been encouraging to see the ways I’ve matured and changed. I look forward to doing this in another ten years and seeing how much more I had to learn (that I didn’t even know, I didn’t know!)

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